If I ever go missing

If ever goes missing, don't look for me. if I don't update facebook/twitter, or don't reply to emails for more than a week, consider me dead. If I don't do these things for a month, I am dead, do not waste time mourning me, move on with your lives. Do not waste 10's of thousands of people's time and effort, do not waste absurd amounts of money looking for me, do not plaster the news and internet with my face and pleas for help finding me. For I'm only a human, 1 in billions, I am not Lauren Spierer magical deity that must be found at all costs, I put my pants on the same way as the next person.