All this intense study and preparation to belong to this society like it's something precious. I mean, this society, its themes and its styles, its decadence, its frivolity come on! Let it go. Let it go you have to go for truth, not compromise. You know, I could offer nobility and say, "No matter what it costs you, no matter what you have to sacrifice for an honest Life, it's worth it." But you're not sacrificing a fucking thing. Because there was nothing offered, you weren't going to get anything anyway. If you followed every rule, if you did everything, followed every political, economic, establishment religion right down the line, every scheme, every dream, every ideal, every golden hand-in-hand to the end of the golden rainbow summer dream it wasn't going to work. The bottom line wasn't going to work and never did work. That's why the place is falling apart! They're desperately trying to hold it all together. But they can't! They think they can tax and legislate themselves into survival. Shit they've already got a million laws on the dumb books about everything and practically none of them are organic. "Maybe if we get tougher again, bring back capital punishment?" Forget it, they don't know a good law from a stupid one. Those tired legal games are just part of the ancient System Game. I mean, that's not Truth! That has nothing to do with the Real problems of existence. That's playing around with it. That's putting silly little patches on the fabric of Life.
But see, the whole social cloth is rotted away with its own corrupt mythology and if you give it any credence, you're just helping put on more patches.
Abandon it!
Whatever has to be done, do it get rid of it. You know you're supposed to try getting married, saving money, buying insurance, making payments, be a consumer and contribute; you have to try working, plug into the job sin-drone, you have to do all these things; it's the American Way, you know, be a nice little boy, without really believing it, understanding it feeling some terrible kind of deprivation but just the same, doing it. But
somehow I would still retain a degree of objectivity while doing it, saying, "What the hell is this, I mean why am I standing in this factory or on this cruddy movie set, you know, on a summer day when the surf is up?" or "Shit, I should be working on my writing, you know. But there I am producing something I don't believe in, doing something I don't believe in, suffocating my Life and my Creativity, for what, to be part of what?" And that was the beginning of, "So they're going to give me some money, they're going to give me a check for doing this, and I can do this for another like forty or fifty years, far out." The subject matter was never searching a Cosmic Morality. It was just a kind of neutering, just an enormous neutering that I saw happening everywhere, that I saw had happened to women, the way they had to get themselves up and act to get anything, to survive at all in the great pukey patriotic patriarchy of the U.S. of A. I saw nobody had gotten anything, it was just one big fantastic rip-off, you see; like the greatest loser's boogie of all time, had been perpetrated upon itself by this species. One is not to be frightened by insanity it would be preferable to be frightened by boredom