(no subject)

in
Nikki is in jail again... damnit... it's like some divine sign that I"m not supposed to have a girlfriend... I loved laura with all my heart and still do... yet she doesn't love me any more than a friend... I have slight feelings for nikki and she is always in and out of the stress center, juvenial, and actually jail. I dunno... I'm just gonna give up I guess... I had fun tonight I gues though... since dev0 is ungrounded now... we went to the mall and had some fun... like before we left we heard Sorry Miss Jackson when we were in Nirvana... and we saw some people we haven't seen in a while... and we saw the coolest guy that has ever walked the earth.
in
Nikki is in jail again... damnit... it's like some divine sign that I"m not supposed to have a girlfriend... I loved laura with all my heart and still do... yet she doesn't love me any more than a friend... I have slight feelings for nikki and she is always in and out of the stress center, juvenial, and actually jail. I dunno... I'm just gonna give up I guess... I had fun tonight I gues though... since dev0 is ungrounded now... we went to the mall and had some fun... like before we left we heard Sorry Miss Jackson when we were in Nirvana... and we saw some people we haven't seen in a while... and we saw the coolest guy that has ever walked the earth.
in
I'm out of ben davis for sure... Friday is my last day. I got some get classes put in its place... I'm gonna have some fun now... being able to come in in the mornings and actually see my friends... Nikki and I go out again... I don't know if this is good or bad... Its probably a little bit of both... anyway... I'm glad that there have been no more serious terrorist attacks. I'm glad that Indianapolis has had nothing bad happen. I hope Laura gets better... I hate seeing her sick. I hope dev-0 and brandi stop fighting. Peace.

(no subject)

in
I'm out of ben davis for sure... Friday is my last day. I got some get classes put in its place... I'm gonna have some fun now... being able to come in in the mornings and actually see my friends... Nikki and I go out again... I don't know if this is good or bad... Its probably a little bit of both... anyway... I'm glad that there have been no more serious terrorist attacks. I'm glad that Indianapolis has had nothing bad happen. I hope Laura gets better... I hate seeing her sick. I hope dev-0 and brandi stop fighting. Peace.

(no subject)

in
Money, yes, it is the new religion. And the moguls of the Money Monarchy have become the priests and popes of this irrational age of corporate planetary domination and destruction. Yes, world bankers and trans-national corporate executives are the true religious leaders. Why? Because the highest, most esteemed calling is high finance. Whole nations are caught up in it. It has become the wishful will of the world and money, the worshipped god. The Wall Street Journal is the Bible, the bank is the cathedral and the people are the parish and they will perish. They will perish because this religion of money seduces people into schemes and dreams of riches and doing in anyone who might get in the way
in
Money, yes, it is the new religion. And the moguls of the Money Monarchy have become the priests and popes of this irrational age of corporate planetary domination and destruction. Yes, world bankers and trans-national corporate executives are the true religious leaders. Why? Because the highest, most esteemed calling is high finance. Whole nations are caught up in it. It has become the wishful will of the world and money, the worshipped god. The Wall Street Journal is the Bible, the bank is the cathedral and the people are the parish and they will perish. They will perish because this religion of money seduces people into schemes and dreams of riches and doing in anyone who might get in the way
in
I'm worried... I haven't heard from my friend tristan since he went to the doctor to find out if he had cancer or not... If they diagnosed him with cancer he probably tried to kill himself... I'm gonna hope that if he did try that thats all he did... was try... and not succeed. He is like a dad to me... He helped me through losing dad... and now if he gets cancer I"m gonna feel like its my fault... All I fucking wan't is someone to have as a dad... Someone to do things with that sons and dads do together... thats all I want... and I can't have it... oh well... Devo and Brandy had a little fight yesterday... they made up like always... It was sad because yesterday was their aniversary to. Um... I'm sitting here talking to Janelle... realizing how pitiful my life is... I go to school... come home... get on the computer... go to sleep... wake up... and start the process all over again. Thats rather very sad. Oh well... I felt bad tagging along with Devo and Brandy this weekend... I feel like I"m just bothering them when they ask me to tag along... and besides when they are being boyfriend and girlfriend I just kinda have to sit there... and watch... and get sad... because I have no one to share my life with... I don't even have any serious friends anymore... just devo... and he's grounded... and he only gets to spend time with Brandy. Oh well... I have my computer... thats all I really need... It gets me through each day... all though lately I've been thinking about killing myself to much... I've even started to think of what to write to all my "friends". I have yet to actually start to write any of it down yet... and when I actually try to kill myself I cop out... Hopefully I never succeed... I know it wouldn't do anything but hurt a few people and maybe cause 1 or 2 people to try and kill themselves. Oh well... I'll stop going on and on now.
Bye for now...
Peace.

-AxisMundi

(no subject)

in
I'm worried... I haven't heard from my friend tristan since he went to the doctor to find out if he had cancer or not... If they diagnosed him with cancer he probably tried to kill himself... I'm gonna hope that if he did try that thats all he did... was try... and not succeed. He is like a dad to me... He helped me through losing dad... and now if he gets cancer I"m gonna feel like its my fault... All I fucking wan't is someone to have as a dad... Someone to do things with that sons and dads do together... thats all I want... and I can't have it... oh well... Devo and Brandy had a little fight yesterday... they made up like always... It was sad because yesterday was their aniversary to. Um... I'm sitting here talking to Janelle... realizing how pitiful my life is... I go to school... come home... get on the computer... go to sleep... wake up... and start the process all over again. Thats rather very sad. Oh well... I felt bad tagging along with Devo and Brandy this weekend... I feel like I"m just bothering them when they ask me to tag along... and besides when they are being boyfriend and girlfriend I just kinda have to sit there... and watch... and get sad... because I have no one to share my life with... I don't even have any serious friends anymore... just devo... and he's grounded... and he only gets to spend time with Brandy. Oh well... I have my computer... thats all I really need... It gets me through each day... all though lately I've been thinking about killing myself to much... I've even started to think of what to write to all my "friends". I have yet to actually start to write any of it down yet... and when I actually try to kill myself I cop out... Hopefully I never succeed... I know it wouldn't do anything but hurt a few people and maybe cause 1 or 2 people to try and kill themselves. Oh well... I'll stop going on and on now.
Bye for now...
Peace.
-AxisMundi
in
I'm sad again I guess... maybe because I was told by everyone that they don't want me around them anymore... I didn't think bob would ever say that to me... I didn't think Benya Benya would have either.... I expected it from Station however... Oh well... I do'nt really need friends anymore... I have to lose my emotions anyway... You can't be a good soldier if you have emotions.

(no subject)

in
They won't let me drop out of ben davis untill the nine weeks ends... which is stupid... because ben davis' grading periods are every 18 weeks... They won't let me have two study centers for the next two weeks so I get to go over to ben davis for 3 hours a day and like read or somethin... I'm not gonna do the work if i'm not even gonna get credit for it... Laura I love you... I would hate for you to die... If you did die I'd miss you... Dev0... get your parents to unground you man... we have to hang out... Well... I'm out... peace
in
They won't let me drop out of ben davis untill the nine weeks ends... which is stupid... because ben davis' grading periods are every 18 weeks... They won't let me have two study centers for the next two weeks so I get to go over to ben davis for 3 hours a day and like read or somethin... I'm not gonna do the work if i'm not even gonna get credit for it... Laura I love you... I would hate for you to die... If you did die I'd miss you... Dev0... get your parents to unground you man... we have to hang out... Well... I'm out... peace

(no subject)

in
I"m gonna be spending a lot of time at home from now on... like anyone cares. Um... you guys will see me around school and thats about it. I've been hurt to much... and I'm just gonna start stayin here and chillin with my computer and my dog. I will probably be writing in here a whole hell of a lot though... in result of me staying home a lot. Anyway. You all don't realy read this anymore anyway. Just a few people that don't even know me. They read it... I guess they are my real friends... they get upset when I don't update and tell me... so Peace and what not.
in
I"m gonna be spending a lot of time at home from now on... like anyone cares. Um... you guys will see me around school and thats about it. I've been hurt to much... and I'm just gonna start stayin here and chillin with my computer and my dog. I will probably be writing in here a whole hell of a lot though... in result of me staying home a lot. Anyway. You all don't realy read this anymore anyway. Just a few people that don't even know me. They read it... I guess they are my real friends... they get upset when I don't update and tell me... so Peace and what not.